Recently I read a post on Facebook that a mother had written explaining why she had not raised her son to celebrate mother’s day. She felt that Mother’s Day was a huge lie in extolling the virtues of mothers. All women are worthy of adoration and that by singling out mothers we are stating that they are superior in some way. She stated that society projects that women are happier simply because they have reproduced. She went on to say that the unhappy women on Mother’s day would actually be mothers themselves, having to deal with their wretched children and the obligatory gifts of chocolates and flowers. She stated that Mother’s day makes non mothers, mothers of dead OR “damaged” children, and women whose mothers have passed away feel terrible. She went on for four L.O.N.G. paragraphs sharing her bitterness over this horrible holiday that is set aside to celebrate Moms. She stated that Mother’s Day “perpetuates the dangerous idea that all parents are somehow superior to non-parents.” And “It should go without saying that I also hate Valentine’s Day.” Well then, I guess that just sums it up.
I’m not certain when it became popular to be a hater of all things meant to promote honor, love, and gratitude, but it seems to be quite the growing trend… Thanksgiving is insensitive to Native Americans, Christmas is over commercialized, Valentine’s is demeaning, Easter is too secularized, Memorial day is exclusive, Mother’s day perpetuates a myth that only women that give birth are worth celebrating…blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. Baloney! I’m surprised I haven’t heard arguments against Earth day… for goodness sake, how could we be so insensitive to the other planets? And now that Pluto has been downgraded we should be extremely careful of the use of the word Planet.
I feel sad that the author of this blog feels so insecure, so unhappy, and so distraught over her upbringing that she chooses to put out negativity and shame on a day that should be spent honoring, remembering and showing gratitude and love for the women who have had an active role in helping raise children. I love my mom and I try and honor her more than once during the year but life has a way of keeping me occupied and I don’t always show her how much I appreciate all that she has done for me. I am glad for a special day that is set aside to let her know how special she is to me. Frankly I am glad for any and all days that recognize people… Secretary’s day, Teacher’s day, Nurse’s Day, Father’s Day, Grandparent’s Day, etc. etc. You get my drift… Just because we honor someone doesn’t mean we are perpetuating a dangerous idea that they are superior to anyone else. I celebrate my daughters birthdays every year and have done so for the past 20+ years… I do not believe, nor do they believe, that they are any better than anyone else on the planet. I celebrate them because I love them, value them, and appreciate them.
There is so much anger and hate, selfishness and exclusion, animosity and discord in this world. That is why I support any and all days that promote happiness and love, selflessness and inclusion, goodwill and harmony. Any day that I can take to make someone else feel loved, cherished, honored, and appreciated is fine by me.